The Inner Dragon


I had an appointment with a modern day shaman a couple of weeks ago. He told me I needed to access my Inner Dragon. My response was, huh? I told him I was aware of my Inner Unicorn but not my Inner Dragon. He told me I needed a dragon to protect my unicorn. Well, that at least made a little sense to me.

After I wrote my blog “YES” last week, I went to an art class where another participant took all my new paints and painted 9 paintings with them (I painted 2) by the end of the class, it was the end of my paints. I didn’t say anything. Alright…I think I get it, it can’t always be “yeses” and “unicorns,” I need my dragon.

The dragon can say NO, the dragon knows boundaries. Healthy boundaries are all about discernment, letting in the good and keeping out the bad. I have healthy boundaries in my relationship with my husband, who like me, is intuitive and sensitive. But now it seems I need to strengthen my boundaries in the rest of my reality. Boundaries are important in the physical world, and if we do not have access to them, we will inevitably be taken advantage of. It is important to be able to say: no; no thank you; or this does not honor me.

I talk about the need for boundaries in my book Manifesting Love From the Inside Out (www.manifestinglove.net) An essential step in successfully defining and expressing boundaries is the ability to communicate without blaming. We need to be able to take responsibility for our feelings, rather than saying “You make me angry” or “You make me sad,” a more responsible way of defining boundaries would be “I feel angry” or “I feel sad.” A formula for emotionally honest communication would look something like:

When you: take my paints
I feel: a bit confused
I would appreciate: if you would ask to borrow them, or perhaps using some other students supplies, so there will be some left for me.

So what I have learned is, if my dragon speaks up, I can stay in the loving energy of the unicorn. If the dragon does not speak up, I build up resentment, frustration and anger – then the unicorn, my sense of connection and my good feelings are gone!

Setting and maintaining boundaries protects our personal connection to Spirit and supports in making that connection a priority. Healthy boundaries create a powerful sense of freedom and safety within ourselves, in our relationships and in the world.

Are you clear in your boundaries? Do you have a healthy balance of the dragon and the unicorn? Write to me I would love to hear your stories and your thoughts!

1 reply
  1. Ray Hartjen
    Ray Hartjen says:

    Interesting post on boundaries. I was pretty stoked to learn that my kids learned the value of "I" messages in elementary school (Pleasanton, CA). It's part of the school district's attempt at building a community based on values. The "I" messages are at the heart of its conflict management program, and the results are pretty evident. These kids are handling more and more of their conflicts on their own, and peacefully at that.

    Lessons for everyone, huh?

    Reply

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